football jokes for kids

Kaka: Huang Kai was the greatest hero of the Istanbul night, although he played only a little. Ancelotti: Huang Kai is a super genius, it's just too bad his body isn’t quite up to par. Maldini: Huang Kai is the most important player on the team. I suggest the club re-sign him for another five years. Barcelona: To sign Huang Kaiwen, we decided to demonstrate our sincerity by signing his cousin with an annual salary of one million euros. The veterinarians in Milan are no good; he won't get injured with us in Barcelona. Bayern Munich: We have the Divine Doctor! Huang Kaiwen, the biggest slacker in soccer. From slacking off every day, forced to make sporadic appearances, he ultimately was forced to become the team's savior. Football, anything is possible!

Izan, a Spanish-Japanese boy who lived with his mother and sister in the heart of Valencia played for the Valencia academy since he could remember. As life fucks as all, Izan found himself being laid off by his club for being talentless. Frustrated, Izan runs around his local pitch, trying to get the news off his mind. As fate would have it, Izan gets struck by lightning which gives him a system. Izan with the system embarks on a journey to becoming 'THE' god of football. We all know he can and probably will but how does he get there? ************ 1. set in post messi-ronaldo dominant era.[2022, post-messi-ronaldo peak era in Europe] 2. Real-world likeness. 3. 1700 words on average 4. There is a system but no over the top emphasis on it. Pure Football lovers here. Let's get this novel up. Help me with your Golden Tickets and reviews and share this Novel ************* Also, all rights reserved for the companies and teams and also players I use in the novel since I don't know how image rights work and I'm too lazy to search it up on Bing-, I mean google 1 dragon: 2 bonus chapters 1 magic Castle= 4 bonus chapters [will be released the day following the gift] 30 golden tickets= 1bonus chapter [will be spread across the week if its too many]

On the eve of the millennium, a sixteen-year-old Chinese boy left his hometown and came to Europe just to play football to support his family. But he didn’t expect that an adventure would make his football career unique from then on. Twenty years of ups and downs, he has won countless honours. Looking back, Ronaldo, Zidane, Ronaldinho, Ronaldo, Messi, Mbappé and many other stars are all shining, but there is only one king of the ball, hanging high in the sky like the sun, shining forever! /!\ I will try my best to correct the error in the MTL novel, but my first language is not English. So, please be indulgent. Thank you ! Author : Salt plum

Ronaldo: Kai, I thought you were here to assist me. Deng Kai: Initially, I indeed came to assist you. Ronaldo: Then why have I become the king of assists? Deng Kai: Because I've realized that I can Carry better than you! Don't be mad, being the king of assists isn't so bad. Everyone is now saying that you and Xixi are in a league of your own beneath me! Ronaldo: Pah! Messi: Smug face! Kaka: ??? Beckham: Watch my flying boot! Fat Ronaldo: I'll get your family some Golden Throat Lozenges! Ronaldinho: Let’s swing together! Zidane: Take this, my Iron Head Skill! Neymar: So what about us younger ones? Deng Kai: We're all kings of the ball, no need to be formal! Keep the music playing on the green field, keep dancing!

A story about a man that died with a lot of regrets. Follow him as gets a chance to rewrite his story and do right by those whom he fails in the past. Follow his journey as he embarks on the road to becoming The Greatest Of All Time, The Goat, The singularity. Of the beautiful game of Football Thank you for giving my novel a chance I’m quit new to this so I hope you enjoyable read in a world of my creation

Inter Milan's star is dim, Florentina is high-spirited, no one in Serie A can forever maintain their reign. Who will unify the world? In 2014, Inter was at a historical low point, ranked 9th in the league, constantly refreshing the lower limit. The glory of the treble winner had disappeared! Fortunately, Tang Long traveled back, and his brain fused with an AI football system called the "Green Grass Wisdom Engine". This system, originating from 2084, combines advanced machine learning, big data analysis, and sports science. It can continuously upgrade through match feed and provide Tang Long with divine predictions! -Cross 5% chance to central area, 5% chance to out of bounds, 90% chance to the near post, move early to grab the spot! -Detected that opponent's center-back pair will have a hidden gap in three seconds, prepare a through pass! -The angle between the wall and goalkeeper is 0.62dc, big data shows shooting the upper right corner has a scoring rate of 88.76%! Tang Long frequently makes "Divine Hand" actions off the pitch, shocking everyone! C Luo: "It's simply divine! Every prediction by Tang is three seconds ahead, he seems to foresee the future!" Icardi: "My European Golden Boot, nine-tenths of the credit goes to Tang!" Guardiola: "He's simply the prophet of the football world in the 21st century!" Mancini: "After Ronaldo, Tang is the second alien. His understanding of football far surpasses this era!"

Lin Wan transmigrated into a book and became the stepmother of the male lead. Her husband was an undisputed big shot in commerce and was cold, decisive, and ruthless. Her stepsons were each more eccentric and difficult than the other... until they took part in a variety show as a family. Five families were competing, each of which was perfectly harmonious... Except for Lin Wan's family. Naturally, they were the control group once the variety show aired. Every other family would have scenes of the parents cooking and the children helping adorably, a picturesque sight of family harmony. On the other hand, Lin Wan and her three stepsons ignored each other as they had crackers and ham for their dinners amidst an eerie silence. At night, while the other families went out happily stargazing and moon-watching, Lin Wan and her stepsons told each other horror stories, leaving the viewers petrified! Netizens were flaming as they watched, but they soon noticed that the control group was changing... Even though the eldest son insisted that he disliked his stepmother, he sneaked off to buy her a scarf! The second son declared his favorite person was his father but voted for his stepmother instead! The third son was also caught putting his stepmother's favorite candy below her pillow! The netizens were shocked, but it's true: the tsundere stepsons were extraordinarily close with their stepmother!

It all started on 28, May, 2011… A football game was played, an unforgettable memory was created, and a dream was born with it. ‘I want to play ball!’ It all ended on 12, May, 2018… Another football game was played, another unforgettable memory was created, and a dream was killed with it. And it all changed on 18, December, 2022… Another football game was played, another unforgettable memory was created, and with it, a miracle was created. {Your plea for a miracle has been answered!} {Congratulations! You have received a reward: Ultimate Football System!} This is the story of Sam, a young Nigerian whose passion for football created a miracle. With his miracle, watch the boy dominate the world of football, break countless records, climb the all-time rankings, and establish himself as the G.O.A.T, the Greatest of all time. Watch Sam become the God of football.

Chu Feng crossed the Jiuzhou Continent and inherited the Ancestor God Blood Pearl, cultivating until he became a Peak Martial Emperor. By chance, he saved an exquisitely beautiful woman with whom he fell in love and married. Unexpectedly, the woman turned out to be the Empress of the Jiuzhou Empire, and after giving birth to twins, a dragon and phoenix, she left without saying goodbye. Through numerous rigorous cleansing and marrow-washing sessions conducted by Chu Feng, these young children astonishingly developed supreme Divine Runes within them, capable of suppressing all forms of energy across Jiuzhou. Three years later, while dull and adorable, the invincible but unaware siblings, took advantage of Chu Feng's secluded meditation during Crossing the Divine Tribulation, sneakily slipped out of the village, and embarked on a journey to find their mother.

Richard Maddox, a once-promising football prodigy, dreamed of becoming a star. But just as his dream was within reach, it was abruptly shattered when he banged his head on the goalpost, fracturing his skull. Forced into early retirement, Richard vanished from the public eye. People thought Richard Maddox was done for. However, no one expected that during his unconscious state, his spirit detached from his body. He drifted through time, witnessing the world of football from the perspective of a ghost. It was strange, unpleasant, yet exciting. No need for tickets or travel—he could simply fly. England, Italy, Spain, Germany—the best football countries in Europe—and even the passionate South America, the energetic Africa, and the growing Asia—Richard observed the rise and fall of football giants, all from the sidelines. However, watching football from the other side was quite different from experiencing it live. He missed the cheering, singing, and chanting with the other fans. No one could hear him now. No one could watch football with him. He was... alone. Just as Richard was about to be bored to death, his soul was sucked back, and he realized that only an entire year had passed. 'Interesting,' he thought, laughing. “I could bet, invest in companies that will succeed in the future, and get rich. Bitcoin, I'm coming, baby.” but who could have guessed that Richard would dive so deep into the world of football—From owning a single share to testing the waters as a scout, trying his hand as an agent, and eventually stepping into the world of coaching, before finally diving into the realm of football club ownership. It has truly been a full spectrum of football, the highs and the lows. Join us as we welcome Richard Maddox!