Synopsis
[Update] As of September, 2021: If you would like to see more of this story, I have switched over to NovelCat for now. Thank you for reading this.
18-year-old Jay had just died, immediately forgetting everything that had once happened, last seeing his corpse surrounded by a group of mysterious individuals as he ascended into the sky. Teleporting into a vast, cloudy rift, he soon became an angel, then hearing a mysterious voice that told him to fulfill the task of preserving and defending life. Then getting sent to an unknown, fragmented world, he prioritized recovering his memories first, as what he had seen previously was very strange to him.
Eventually, Jay had soon met up with a family who had lived by a forest as he mysteriously woke up in their home. Although a bit paranoid at first, his life began to feel nice and pleasant as he had a lot of fun experiences spending time with them. As he had gotten to know the family, he quickly began to form a strong relationship with them. However, since nothing is perfect, his happiness was soon short lived, as an unfortunate series of events had begun to turn his brief utopian life of satisfaction into a long, grieving Hell for the rest of his time.
[Side Note]
The beginning of this novel is a very slow start, and it may even seem boring and lackluster to you.
But I promise you that the story will get many times better (I'd say it starts getting interesting at chapter 9), with more action, events, and plenty more characters.
As a new author, with time and experience comes a much greater improvement in quality, and so you may see that the more you progress through each chapter of my story.
And for those who've read this message and are willing to stick along, I promise I won't leave you disappointed.
[Another Side Note]
This is a lot darker than your typical fantasy isekai (reincarnation).
Death and gore will be included.
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30Reviews
4.91
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A nice retake and a unique concept of world! I believe that this novel will become great in the near future! The author intricately designed his craft meticulously! This needs to read by more readers in the future and definitely recommend this one!
The writing style is so good! The way the story progressed was interesting, as well. The moment the story started, I was already intrigued, I'm going to keep reading this!
I added this also in a comment but reading this feels the same way as playing an action role-playing game and having fun while doing it. The author has put a lot of thought in building the base of the story and comes upfront with details that I felt it could actually be a script for an upcoming game. As an author myself, I stay away from creating new worlds with their fantastic elements and lore because I know the effort and the imagination one will need to do that so every time I come across someone who does that all I can say is 'chapeau'!. Great use of imagination. I am still to end all the chapters and I can not shake this feeling that I am holding a controller and I am the one doing the actions and selecting the dialogue - awesome.
Top quality web novel here. I love the way the novel opens, throwing the reader right into the protagonist's shoes as he is being reincarnated as an angel, learning about the new world and its rules and history alongside him. Excellent world building, limitless potential for future adventures and sequels. I will be sure to keep reading this one!
Great cover page! Original and catchy! The synopsis is also well written. Very interesting story from the beginnig! The plot is captivating, the characters expressive. You're doing well! You don't really struggle with tenses, style or grammar. It's your advantage over the rest (non-English speakers), use it well! Wish you endless inspiration and a lot of great ideas!
You had me at world descriptions. You laid all too well author. Enough to create a picture on your readers' minds of what the world truly looks like in your story. I praised you for that. So now, I'll just leave this review, show my support through power stone, and proceed to read more. Hands raised to you author! Great job!
I love the fact that we thought of similar plots to our books but executed them in interesting ways, that just shows how us the concepts used are, great work
JAY! A hell is short for what might've happened gosh. His character is just empowering although the perplexion, this is a great story to read considering the plot, the author has put effort into the world building and also given the reader a detailed itinerary in the auxiliary volumes, GOOD JOB! SO UNDERRATED WTH! coyote's den was my favourite chapter because of the incorporation of suspense and build-up!
This piece of work is amazing! The synopsis is fascinating. The language that the author used is also well-written and beautiful. I have already been hooked up after reading a dozen or so released chapters and would like to find out more about Jay's journey. I would recommend you give this novel a try. It is definitely worth it! Good Job, Author!
interesting plot! there were new ideas and terms i have never read before. the writing, grammar and all, needs a bit of polishing but that doesnt hinder you from understanding the plot.. keep writing dear author and rise up!😊
I think for this story the strongest part would be the descriptions for fighting and things like that. Yours is actually that has plenty of chapters so I can get a pretty (so-so?) good hold on which direction it's going. When it comes to fighting and whatnot, it's quite good with the only thing that I would mention is the use of ellipses [...] where at the beginning of the quote there's one so: "...he was called." "... he was called." ignoring the capital issues there because eh, I think (I'm positive I'm right) there's is supposed to be a space (??). Might want to check on that just in case, but it doesn't really affect anything so it's good. The other thing, which I think is really personal, but in my opinion can affect the quality of the story is how the story is built. So we're introduced to this world and these two factions, because I don't want extreme spoilers, A and B. Our protagonist is in faction A, and the antagonist is in faction B. A is obviously a faction that is fighting for what in this particular situation is considered "good" and B is fighting for something that is considered "bad" or to some degree "selfish". But B has a reason for it so they're not completely bad. There is a single outstanding problem that I find happens and some people really like it (recently it's become pretty popular), but it's sort of shallow. It's the idea that A will (have to) beat B, but B is not completely bad. The issue is that A itself isn't in a situation where they need to be bad. They are automatically good because their interests align with the interests of the general assumption of good (I hate writing like this, it sounds weird). If this is the case then A isn't necessarily good, they're in the same situation as B except they don't need as much risk as B. There have been cases of people taking on the opinion of B and that really showcases where this entire concept breakdown. So, the easiest is the Demon and Humans and whatnot. Some people take in the views of the Demons or whatever and they either change it so that the humans are the aggressors, so humans are bad and they are defensive. Except, when it's flipped, the humans are acting completely in self interest and it's pretty much the same as Demons, except their self interest includes attacking the other. When it's the Humans being good, Demon bad, it's switched. This works if this is independent as A and B are separated and there's only one negative and it they are just negative with some exceptions (that's something else I want to mention). This happens in a lot of fics and I notice it a lot, but sometimes there really just isn't enough information to judge, or there's another variable, C, that balances it enough for it to be fine. There's nothing wrong with it. There are also stories where we are in the view of the aggressor, like in Death Note, where the 'villain' is also the protagonist. That's fine too and is really interesting. It happens in Crime in Punishment where the murderer is the protagonist, where we compare our normal beliefs of 'correct' in this story so the murderer is the 'villain'. There's nothing wrong with that as the purpose isn't to create a right or wrong, but to establish another point or to entertain. These are in a sense, to me at least, sort of outside the basis of 'good' or 'bad' or they are trying to create a point on it, in which it's necessary and is effective. In this story's case, however, A and B are both involved. And this happens in children's books to show us the 'grey' zone, which I mean is fine, but it's not really the best method to represent the 'grey' zone as it can be misused to pity the offending faction (which has become relevant where suddenly everyone forgets that this person has friggan killed someone and the family is not neurotic for wanting revenge). In this scenario, we have A and B, but B is the aggressor not out of purely being cruel, but because they need to or by some outstanding condition they become B and need to. There's a bump and it's that A isn't good then. A isn't a 'good' faction, they're just a faction going against B, but in this story it's written so that while there is some pity for B, A is generally assumed to be good, which when taking into account every information given so far makes zero sense as both factions are doing things to ensure their survival. A isn't power-hungry jerks, but... okay... actually... I just figured out a way to explain this better. Let's say Dogland accuses Catland of making too much of bad particles. But, Catland is making bad particles because they need to use bad particles to make good particles. But add this, Dogland needs bad particles to stay as the 'good' side. Then that means that Dogland benefits from bad particles and Catland also benefits from bad particles, they just benefit in a different way. It's the same with this idea where A is good, but only because B is bad. Which is a horrible standing for what makes a person a good person because it doesn't mean A is good, it just means that B right now, helps A seem good in this very specific situation. Simply put A into another situation and suddenly A is either bad or average. This happens in a lot of webnovels and while it's fine I guess, it's just not really realistic as to what a person is because people can be bad and everyone assume they're good simply because interests align. I know it's a fantasy and I know this is really weird to be whining about, but I think, and I have a hunch, it'll really start to affect the rest of the story if A is not proven to have no incentive to help B, therefore making A good. Unless of course A isn't supposed to be good. Some mangas and animes solve this by simply utilizing the fact that B is like a lizard. Or sometimes they purposely do this to make it so that the reader base spreads out a little, some liking the antagonist, some not. I don't personally like that when it happens because while it's good at showing that 'grey' zone (something that disney has recently taken a liking to and frankly I like the old disneys better) it's not... idk... really showing what it is to be a person. They're not people, they're carefully crafted characters to appeal to us and I mean I do that too with minor characters(OvO), but it limits what the character can do, and sometimes (and this is what I'm worried about with this story) entire places or factions. Where the line between what's right or wrong becomes simultaneously blurry and clear. And this isn't some people aren't just good or bad, this is people aren't necessarily good just because they do good things, say good things or agree with what is collectively known as good. It'll affect the story in the long-run, especially if there's going to be something into the nitty gritty (and it has already become to happen) with the B(ad) side. This happens only during world building, and sometimes if the story doesn't revolve around this, but this story's entire conflict is this problem and unless it's going to be this is this, that is that, no arguing with the omnipotent author san (which is also fine, but then I would recommend turning this into a comedy), it'll be a problem. okay... second part... I felt like I was repetitive, was I repetitive? sorry... Q.Q Characters... this is an entirely different problem I swear. I think the character interaction are kind of kiddish? I don't know, it's kind of my opinion but if I were to play this in my head and then apply myself to this situation... I wouldn't react this way assuming of course, I am normal and have normal interactions with others. If someone were to say everything single conversation in this story to me (And this is in the perspective of current... pretty modern methods of talking to each other) then I would find them really annoying and very clearly attempting to be nice while also knowing they aren't nice. In which they are nice, but I just dislike them. I don't know how to describe it, but it just doesn't really seem like a relationship that signifies how close someone is (if they aren't close then it doesn't really display that either). These characters are sort of in the middle between close and not-so-close which is weird and uncomfortable. And I mean some people argue, no it's great and we love it, but I say it's uncomfortable. For me at least. I mean... the characters develop, but they are developing to become better or worse, not becoming both better and worse, or like 75% or 25% or whatever. It's like Percy Jackson ??? (and I sort of like Percy Jackson Books, but also it was kind of those kinds of books people grow out of??? idk what other people think) Final thing I can see where this is going, and in a manner where I can actually right now plot out what the endings can be some with allowances. I don't know if it'll change, but if it does deviate from what I'm thinking, it'll definitely be fantastic (which is why I didn't take anything off for it). And I have been told that I have inhuman standards so I just didn't take anything off for it. There are a couple ways fantasy writers avoid this and it's a. just not avoid it, make this entirely fantasy, b. do a super big plot twist, like the one in genshin impact (but they kind of messed it up with the amount of information they gave, they gave away toooooooo much. Enough for it to be suspicious and it fell apart there for me at... around... AR: 35 where I sort of am sure of what's going to happen in general, with another incident happening too maybe???). Super big plot twists are fine, just be careful with what the readers are given, what they can inference from what is given, but don't make it too hard that the readers have a hard time understanding why it happened. I don't have supreme expectations for a webnovel as much as I do for someone who has years of experience with writing, but I just thought I'd highlight some of the things that I thought would affect this in the future. Btw, I know people are saying this is something that deviates from the current understanding of what is cliché, but c'mon. Cliche changes, cliche is something that is seriously pointless... it's just... people get used to some things over time and then get bored with similarities between them. People are curious and can make connections, saying a story is cliche is like saying that hamburgers are cliche because there are hamburgers everywhere. ANYWAY I really liked how the descriptions were made, like... it was cool and it sounded awesome. I'm not sure if this is a spoiler, so I'll just leave on spoiler...
Reveal Spoiler
The story is well written, I always find fantasy stories hard to read/write bacause it requires alot of mind pressence and this one made a well written unique world .
This is a well written novel. Every arc leads into the next, keeping you roped in for the story. I wanted to keep reading the entire time. I especially liked how the author used mystery to move the plot along. Keep up the good work!
Not exactly a new concepts but it's one that the author handles well. Combined with a lack of grammatical errors in comparison to most novels on this site, the novel is ahead of the curve. My only gripe is the update rate but in general it's a good story.
This was a great read. The author does a great job of constructing an understandable and solid world. Paired with well grounded characters, an intriguing plot and the authors amazing writing style, this story is nothing short of a five star. What really stuck out for me was the authors magic system. Personally, i found it easy to understand and grasp. It's very unique and clearly well thought out. Nice work.
It is a wonderful language of expression. While reading, I felt like I was in the story. The fiction and the world are pretty well worked out. In summary, I really liked this novel, I strongly recommend you to read it.
Everything is good about this novel. Writing style to character development, the language is of good quality, the length of each chapter covers a lot of events unlike other newbies writers. keep up the good work... Try it, it just might be your cup of tea!!!
Wow! Fantasy and Adventure are my greatest possession. I can picture all the details you write. I can't help but to amazed at your amazing work. Good job for creating this wonderful book. Keep up the good work author hoping to read more of your chapters.
This novel is so good to be true, can't take my eyes away from this. It feels like heaven to read, I wanna read it so much. If this novel got some drive, then thanked God its still alive. This novel is so good to be true, can't take my eyes away from this. I need this novel like it's quite all right. I need this novel to warm my lonely nights. Just read this novel, cause I... say... Shameless Promotion: Check out my novel: Blood Burning Blood. Hahaha. https://m.webnovel.com/book/blood-burning-blood_19157009606618805
This story is excellent, a very constant view when it comes from its initial and middle plots. Being a fantasy romance, its fluidness is pretty balanced. The writing skill of the author is excellent. Very good use of punctuations, paragraphing and volume in detail. From a first time stand point, this story is very eye-catching from the start lifting a very exciting and happy tone to its readers. The stability of updates are also reasonable good, even if there iss some gaps in between, the detail in story levels up to it. Character designs are pretty good, fitting for the story. Each have their own proposition in plot and makes up to it with its consistent personality, attitude and relations of the other characters involved. World background is rather balanced as of writing this, consisting of 24 chapters it gives quite alot of details. Keep up the good work Author!