Eva (HunterxHunter)

LV 4

KhanQi

Although this book has only just started, I am very optimistic. The title is concise, but the content is not simple. The plot of the story is full of ups and downs, which fascinates people. I hope the author can persist in updating and bring good stories to more people.

LV 1

ScarfulEcliplse_35

Amazing story I haven't read a good HXH story in months. Although you haven't posted in years I still want to say how great it was. [img=recommend]

LV 4

Ken_Raynous

The author's writing is good enough for a fan-fiction. Being a fan of the anime, I must admit that he has managed to handle the characters of the original content quite well, although I would like to know if eventually others will enter the story. The additional character "Eva" is sufficiently mysterious and relatable to be likeable. Like a previous reviewer, I agree that there is a bit more slice-of-life than I expected, although the share of action is more than enought considering what the synopsis proposes. At the same time, I do believe the author should work a bit more on what surrounds the characters and that with which they interact, so that readers can commit more with the story.

LV 5

Chryiss

Writing, Updates: 5 Character, Story, World: 4 The writing is good overall; the only real errors I saw were some missing periods at the end of sentences, but that’s minor. As for italics, sadly this site doesn’t have them in place for Original stories yet (silly right). I’m ok with the asterisks, but another common way on this site to indicate internal monologue without italics is through ‘single quotes.’ I’m not at all familiar with HunterxHunter, but I’d say that you did a pretty good job with introducing the characters! I also liked how you introduced them mostly in pairs rather than all at once or in a handful. That easily makes character identification difficult. But since you didn’t, I grasped/kept track of the characters pretty well overall. You also flesh them out to a decent degree, but I hope to see more of their distinct personalities and train of thoughts and motivations. Plotwise, I feel like nothing really big has happened yet. This is also written in a more of Slice of Life style rather than the action I was sorta expecting from the name of the series this fan fiction is based. Again, don’t know it well, so this could very well be a null point to make, but a little more action doesn’t hurt for the non fan fiction reader who can’t pick up on the subtleties and humor of some non-action scenes like with the shopping and the dress. World building, I wish for more description of settings and a basic overview weaved into the story about the premises of HunterxHunter, like what they do. Again, this isn’t necessary for people familiar to it, but as a general story for anybody, the clarification/set-up is missing a little. I feel like I’d probably appreciate this more overall if I was familiar with the series, but from an outside perspective, you’ve done well! Keep it up!