/ Book&Literature / Harry Potter- necromancer system rise
Synopsis
Edward a person of the earth who is beaten by bullies every day just for being emo. They say that he is a Satanist and beat him more until one day he did not warm up anymore, gave up his life and threw himself from a building to end his suffering. Little did he know that his suffering was about to begin.
(I know the synapse sucks but give it a chance. I am a Brazilian writing so my English may be a little out of shape and too correct and maybe have errors please correct me and please read and do not judge just because I am from another country.)
Parents Strongly Cautioned
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hello dear author I'm here to give you an honest and i hope constructing review about the first chapter of your fan-fiction ... 1. i like the starting plot : a man reincarnated in the harry potter novel world is not really imaginative (as it has been done an awful lots already )but everything need a starting point right ? what make your plot interesting is the necromancer part, going straight to the dark path i quite good ( it bring a lot of freshness in the horde of righteous prick out there ) 2. although the emo part give a bit of shape and depth to your hero you over did it lol seriously his name make me cringe, his name literally mean from hell and is followed buy the name of the Greek goddess of sorcery it's a bit too much . 3. you need a good deal of editing but i won't be too hard on you as english is not your primary language so here is my conclusion a good starting point but it need more work on the back ground and better editing try too not exaggerate too much on the emo part and you'll be able to make a readable story, or even a good story ( those a really becoming rarer) . i only gave you 2 stars because i lack material to really judge your work . i hope my review will be helpful to you