Webnovel Author: Kana_Haisha - Novel Collection

Review written as of 4 ch being published (5 w/prologue). What to say, well, there's nothing particularly outstanding. Frankly, the novel reads like a stereotypical superpower shounen manga. Personally, that style where characters are shouting out their moves and it's a rambunctious tone where the fights don't really seem to matter (almost like a sport) is not really my thing. But I've read things that aren't my things because of other factors, usually the writing quality. It isn't bad here, it's just extraordinarily ordinary. There are grammar mistakes throughout, but they aren't disruptive. Characters don't seem particular deep, but they aren't super shallow either. There's a bit too much exposition for my taste, and the plot is similar to the thousands of other shounen-esque novels out there. In other words, it is completely average. It's fine. It's not bad, but it's not good either. The fight scenes were probably the best thing about it since they tended to be a bit more descriptive than the rest of the novel. I don't really have much else to say, it's fine.

This review was written after Ch 13 had been published. Overall, this is an extremely well-written novel. The word choice is superb and descriptions are apt given the setting of the world. The descriptions themselves are incredibly vivid without over-describing, leaving just enough for the reader to imagine on their own. There were only a handful of grammar mistakes (less than 1/ch), and none were disruptive the reading experience. If I were to turn this in to my editor (journalist), they would be ecstatic with its quality. The characters too, are extremely well-done, with dynamics and relationships being incredibly interesting and real, even with the incredibly slow pace, and even that serves the story extremely well. With that being said, following the kiss shared between Howells and Hayes, I started to lose interest in the story. Sure, there were consequences to it, and it was either a rising action or the climax of the story (not enough is written to characterize it as either), but those consequences were seemingly minimal. That doesn't necessarily mean that the characters never think about it again or it doesn't influence their decisions, but that the feelings don't change. There is the same sense of tension there always was between them, the kiss merely served as a momentary respite from that tension. But that in it of itself was not enough to put me off reading, hardily so. The masterful construction of paragraphs and emotions really grasps my attention, even if the plot is heading in a predictable direction - I still feel the need to read it anyway. However, again following the kiss, both Hayes and Howells become extremely unlikable. I understand that I'm not the target audience for this novel, I'm just a dude in my 20s, but Howells becomes nearly incomprehensible in her feelings. She evidently feels conflicted, and the author does a great job portraying this conflict and the damage the kiss and the actions that followed did to her pride, but why Howells came to this conclusion is downright bizarre to me. Why would it matter if Hayes was acting with instinct or thought, it didn't change the fact that she was giving herself to you. Yet, Howells continues down this path, causing what should be irreparable damage to their relationship. Hayes too, becomes extremely unlikable. Howells essentially unjustly accuses her of something Hayes should have no reason to understand or agree with, yet Hayes then goes on to portray exactly those things. While before the kiss, Hayes was envisioned as an aloof and emotionally-distant, borderline-genius writer whose narcotic habits and nightly forays kept her in trouble. After the kiss, Hayes accuses her of being emotionally-distant, and it's clear that Hayes does feel for Howells, but instead of exploring that line of thought, Hayes seemingly turns cold and callous. Sure, she initially tried to talk to Howells about it, but instead of pressing on and either getting some kind of conclusion, she gives up and becomes kind of a prick to Howells, who does rightly deserve it, but even still it goes against Hayes's true intent. At least that's my perspective. These characters themselves follow their own structure, and in that sense they are very realistic. However, despite their realism, I now have nobody to root for, and instead find myself being drawn more to Welch and his smart retorts rather than the two characters around which the plot revolves. As, even in his short amount of screen time, is a hell of a lot more sympathetic than a cold and callous dope-addict who can act like an asshole, and our protagonist who seems to be an asshole more than not. Of course, all of my criticisms are personal nitpickings of a plot with characters I have subjectively come to dislike more than an objective analysis. And perhaps I've misinterpreted along the way. All in all, it is extremely well-written, with writing that keeps readers interested despite a predictable plot and extraordinarily slow pacing. It is a phenomenal piece of work, and I look forward to seeing out the conclusion of this piece along with future writings. Best regards.

This review has been written based on the first 22 chapters. The very first thing that jumped out to me was the quality of the writing. The word choices and phrasing were extremely well done, with a natural flow following. Character introductions were relatively smooth, and they allowed the reader enough time to digest each individual and remember their names. Additionally, the author has included a glossary for unique terms that they employ, something that other authors should be doing but aren't. Though, the author takes great care not to overwhelm you with new terms and doesn't force you to memorize them, as such great care is taken that context clues reveal the gist of their meanings. As for criticism, the biggest problem for me was grammar. Though, it is worth noting this is more of nitpick than anything, as the vast majority of the grammar is fine, and even the mistakes only minorly disrupt the reading. Usually, these mistakes come with the phrasing of certain sentences or a missing article here and there - both things that will improve as the author gains experience. My other criticism is also a nitpick. Throughout the first 22 chapters, conflicts feel incredibly sudden. There is a bit of foreshadowing, but the switch from peaceful dialogue to emotional and tense drama is rather jarring. Nonetheless, it does serve to create tension within the story and doesn't need to be altered. In a similar vein, the pacing, at times, drags to a crawl, especially in long sequences of dialogue. However, like the sudden appearances of conflict, it serves a purpose in the story, and isn't needlessly dragged out by the author to fill the pages of their novel. Overall, this is a very solid story with a much higher standard of writing than the vast majority of original works on this site. The only thing that needs objective work is the grammar in places, as the absence of articles and the awkward and grammatically incorrect phrasing of certain sentences disrupts the reading experience, albeit in a minor way. Keep up the great work!

This review is based upon the first 5 chapters. Honestly, the opening is very strong and does an extremely good job at capturing the reader's interest and laying the groundwork to build upon that interest. However, it is broken up by grammatical errors, most notably the inconsistent changing of tenses, which really break up the flow of the novel. Phrasing and language choice is also a bit awkward at times, with certain descriptions being unnecessarily repeated (a thesaurus is a friend when you find yourself repeating descriptions). Despite this, the first chapter does leave the reader wanting more to some extent, but then they go to seek relief and find that the second chapter is entirely exposition and nothing else. It throws a ridiculous amount of terms and characters at the reader, and the reader feels obliged to remember them all. This isn't helped either by the choice to follow 3 different characters through the first 5 chapters, with Ch 2 being excluded for following no character (all exposition). All of this leads in a rather confusing experience for the reader. Overall, there is a lack of trust for the readers to understand new material as it shows up naturally in the story, and so it becomes exposition instead. Grammatical errors hold the writing back, especially the issues with tense. Lastly, there is generally too much going on, perhaps this improves as one gets further into the novel, but there are too many initial terms and names that the reader becomes utterly overwhelmed. With that being said, there is an interesting foundation, and the setting appears rather unique. The pacing, at times, is also very good, especially during fight scenes where play-by-play really sets the tone. All in all, I'd score this novel a tad below average, being held back by too much exposition and tense issues.

TLDR: Solid foundation, but hasn't yet made the most of it. Holy expo-dump. It's competently done, but still in the style of most web-novels - a step-by-step guide to the author's created world. It's overbearing, but, again, not unlike most web-novels. Some writing errors, particularly tenses, cause misinterpretations of the writing to occur. I like the cheeky tone of the narrator. It is uniquely done, and the tone itself isn't overbearing, even if the exposition is. But after the first chapter, the narrator changes, and the tone is no longer present. Some word-choices are odd, and feel out of place. Very solid descriptions, really paints the picture for readers. Honestly, I liked the first chapter better than the 6 that followed, but I think the author has great potential to grow. So, I've used my daily power on them.

Is it Chapter 1 or a Prologue (it reads more like a prologue)? While the prologue serves as an exposition dump, it is done in an interesting enough way that the reader doesn't feel put off by an excess of information. However, the exposition and world building are too muddled to really make heads or tails of, so it reads like a bit of a mess. If it were clearer, my rating would improve, but perhaps the prophetic- and prophecy-like tone is intentional, it's difficult to say without more chapters.