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This book has been dropped out but the Author is working on the story and will publish it in the future.
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4.82
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As promised, here are my bullet points over what I read: ~The first thing I noticed was how nice your descriptions were! The sense of motion created by the setting was very intriguing, and I liked it as a start. The ending of the opening chapter was also very suspenseful since I hadn't completely expected that twist. (I would like to see what you do with that plot point later as it arose very early in the story, and I did not see it return in the second chapter.) ~However, for the writing/prose quality, I would like to caution you about verb forms since many sentences that were otherwise well-written became fragments due to how the verb was conjugated. At times, I had trouble understanding what was going on due to this. The occasional overuse of commas also broke the flow, and as a relatively minor issue, the spaces between the quotes didn't need to be there (though the ending dialogue punctuation should have been fixed by putting commas when there was a dialogue tag). If you would like, I can put some of these suggestions as comments on your story's first chapter! I also think an online grammar-checker would benefit you on this front. ~On top of the description, the specific word choice was also great for establishing the tone of the story! It gave me a good idea of the setting and time period of the opening scene. ~I also thought the way you described the action was crisp but evocative. The fights were explained well to the point I could see all the interesting powers and motions in my head. ~Using a flashback in the first chapter to create suspense with the toy was great! I thought it would have had more impact with proper formatting (ex. a space or 3 asterisks between the sections/scenes to distinguish between them). ~Your characters (especially Eliana) seemed interesting and mysterious; however, there were so many people that it was hard to keep track of everyone in the first chapter. The gradual introduction of information about Eliana was very nice, though, and it was refreshing compared to the possible info dump it could have been. It made me wonder more about her! I felt like there was a lot to her beyond her powerful persona. ~For Drystan, it took me a moment to associate the character with the name. I thought it would have been helpful if you included a small epithet about who he was for clarification when he was introduced. ~Finally, I saw you responded to another commenter/reviewer about how you painted the cover. Let me just say: I'm impressed! It's absolutely gorgeous, and it catches my eye. Keep up the great work! I'm excited to see where your story goes, especially with such a dramatic and dark start! :)
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Definitely a great start! I applaud the author for the amazing world building and well fleshed main character. The first chapter intrigues me and now I'm waiting for the next chapters.
First of the the synopsis is a total go, it makes me wanna know more. and drive into the first chapter which makes me can't keep it anymore. the characters are well plot. and the plot is an interesting one.
First of all I really like the way the characters are presented, the development is will written. The story has a lot of potential. It can hooks the readers attentions. keep up the good work.
The Novel is beautifully described and written and for a reader like me who likes poetic lines, this novel would be the best choice. The only problem is about the updates so I hope you could update it frequently.
Such an interesting story, since it is an FL novel so it's definitely my cup of tea, you started so well that it got me hooked right away. I'm sure the story will be so much more interesting in the future. Good luck author great work and well-written story.
great start. i love the writing quality, it's easy to read. i love the story development, how the story flow's great. the character design also, i love it. updating stability's also good. i can imagine the world background it's like i'm there watching those scenes. i love this novel so much even thou it only has 2 chaps. i'm waiting for the upcoming chaps author.
The description is legendary, some of the best description on Webnovel. I think the dialogue is solid. It's a good story all in all. Still there is a little something that's missing and I'm not sure what. I think, there needs to be a bit more meaty world-building.
interesting start, he loved the back story and the unique idea. I like it so much. i hope the author don't drop it keep going I Highly recommendation great story
This book is vividly written. Each paragraph Inciting the reader to scroll to the next chapter. The amount of detail and effort put into this story by the author paints an almost movie like image as you read. Definitely recommend, I myself will be following each update closely.
This is brandon gould i am responding to a review swap here is my review The chapters that are out right now are very compelling and is written well. there is also more potental for more chapters that will set up a very intresting high fantasy epic that will have a very intresting history of the world and diffrent types of races of creatures that live in this world. the story so far is well paced. I will make sure to look out for more chapters to see what happens next
I really like the style of storytelling and describing everything in the story. When I read, I immediately imagine how all the actions are taking place in front of me. Looking forward to new chapters <3
This story has an intriguing start and had a strong FL. I like how she was introduced. I hope she stays strong even if the romance starts., I wish I could read more., I kept this in my collection to find out more about Eliana and 'that key'., :) You have a good story., Keep on updating., :)
Amazing start. super powerful Female lead, Eliana Sarafina. The story has Intresting start which creates suspens, and thrill. world building is amazing and do is the characters. story development is very good. writing quality is good also u will find some mistakes but that is not much of a problem. i wish there were more chao to get more clear picture of story. but overall what i read i like it. keep it up author[img=update][img=update]
I have to confess, that I haven't heard half of the words used in this novel, ever in my life. I read all the three chaps with a Google tab opened next to the novel, to learn the meaning of some words😅 As per the story and narration, it is good and the synopsis shows the quality of the world-building yet to come. Loved the first and second chap and the characterization of the lead female is excellent! It is non-cliche, has grey shades, is bossy, overall a fantastic job on that. Will be looking forward to upcoming chapters (need to take some notes from your work😇).
I must say from what I have read the author has placed alot of time and effort with these chapters. The characters are well thought out and setting also. With every book has there flaws and this is no different. I look forward to where the story leads 🙂
It's a well-written novel. The Characters all are engaging. The plot is very unique which makes readers read all the chapters up to date. Keep it up
Hey hey hey! I love the way you describe it! I mean, I'm totally hooked! The introduction is really amazing! I think it's enough to make someone read the rest! Keep up the great work author!
I got hooked in the story right from the first chapter. I really like stories with strong female leads and this story has everything needed. Kudos to the author.
Great Start!! An interesting plot put into writing with rich vocabulary. A well-written fantasy novel with powerful female lead and various fascinating elements involved. Waiting for next chapters!! Keep Going!!!