Danmachi: The Cursed Spear

"I don't know how to say this, but you are so bland, you make cardboard taste heavenly."
I flinched, lowering my head. I thought I was average.
"Use one of your wishes to be someone at least slightly attractive, or I will use one of them to do so anyway."
I crouched, which felt weird since I had no body, and hugged my legs in despair.
"Seriously, you're so bland you make bland one-liners hilarious."
Aw, come on.
"You're so boring, you make the gods watch paint dry for entertainment."
Motherfucker.
"You're so dumb-"
I was an A+ student!
"You went to a library to find Facebook!"
Okay, that was just mean.
"You so dumb five gods had to dig to find your IQ!"
I didn't even want to be reincarnated anymore.
A god was using yo mama jokes to insult me directly.
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I don't own Danmachi, just so you know.