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PsychoSatoshi

PsychoSatoshi

male LV 4

I like reading what I choose to read and it just so happens that I like reading what I read on here. :)

2018-09-26 Joined Global

Badges 5

Moments 15

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
What a strange way to begin a conversation.
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Her > He Hah. Foreshadowing.
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Glad u asked > I’m glad you asked… Shortcuts in a story isn’t good if the story isn’t 1. a chat fic or 2. a crackfic. This book is neither. No u, ur, r, lol or the likes unless you want to make a reader huff a chuckle. 🛒 “I am Lilith Origami, and also your savour” > “My name’s Lilith Origami. I’m the one who saved you,”
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Naw man, angels gotta read your soul number and register you into purgatory. I should know. It happened to my pal patrick.
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Man’s momentarily became a cartoon character

Like a bird, the man was sent flying face first into a tree, splattering blood against the tree trunk.

Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
That looks like a terminology used on human androids who’ve had their database on emotions wiped. Pretty neat comparison
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Show them your power kevin my boi 😤
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Nice spawning point bro 💃👌

Walking out, he was nearly blinded by the light coming from the sun. He was previously in a cave which explained why his surroundings were so dark. Looking at the environment, he stood on top of a mountain heavily engulfed by snow. The mountain he stood on provided a beautiful view of the area, as far as his eyes could see he was in a mountainous area all covered in snow. From the top, he could also make out an abundance of trees suffering the same fate.

Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Yet still a lone man > Yet, no matter the power he possesses, he is still a lone man. A mortal man at that. Alas, not even his mortal body could handle his power… > His mortal body couldn’t handle the full extent of his powers; as a consequence, his body tragically eroded away. I like the consequence for having too much power as a mortal. If he were a god or something, I’d understand but since he isn’t, death or the equivalent of it -erosion- is logical. Cool. R. I. P. Lone Man
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Fascinating. If this were a political-based story, this man’s bloodline would be a major weapon for whatever planet/place he’s aligned himself with.
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Do they rein the universe? Selective planets? Also, I like the idea of a good-sounding thought of unifying the universe, being executed in the wrong way. It makes sense that they try to ‘unify’ the universe by bloodshed.
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Ah yes, the classic! Very nice on making the Genois race reasonable as a whole. They’re strong so therefore they’re the “best” race in the universe. With that in mind, it’s not that far fetched to believe that they think their opinions of the universe is fact rather than just that: opinion or a thought that’s shared among themselves.
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Were > was Was it man > could his best creations have been man? Plants that hold dear life? > Could it be plants, the beginning of all life? Or probably > Or perhaps it’s… The answer is simple, the universe! > The answer to that question is, quite simply, the universe. This is an interesting start to the book. It’s strong and it hooks the reader in, nice,
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Dimensional Overhaul

Dimensional Overhaul

Fantasy · DymenS

PsychoSatoshi
Posted
Writing Quality: There are a few grammatical errors in the story that can be easily overlooked by other readers— however, I will not overlook it. I want this book to be at a quality it deserves: the best. I think an editor or beta reader would vastly improve the quality of this book which can lure in a bigger reader base. The way characters speak and think, can sometimes be stiff— this can be easily fixed. I pointed this out because the formal words, accompanied with the occasional informal words, can make for a jarring reading. Think of a painter who created a realistic painting of a mountain with a cartoon character inserted in the middle of it. It doesn’t fit. I hope that, in the future, these minor things can be fixed to provide a better reading experience for readers. The biggest gripe I have when it concerns the writing, is when something is told to me and not shown. There are so much details that haven’t been described explicitly, which I personally think is a shame. There were so many missed opportunities that could have been taken advantaged of in order to really get a reader into the thick of the plot. Of course, this is only a personal opinion and, in the end, it doesn’t affect my rating of the writing quality that much. Don’t let the writing quality stop you from reading this, however. It’s a treasure that’s yet to be dusted. Update Stability: I know that the author updates once a day, which I applaud them for. I’m well aware that this is not an easy feat unless you have a lot of ideas -that the Author has proven that they have-, inspiration and determination -a trait that, again, the Author has-. Kudos. I noticed someone mention that the chapters are updated at random time because there are no stockpile chapters. Allow me to applaud the Author again; having no stockpile chapters, yet still they update -or try to make up for missed updates the following day- daily? This alone tells me that the Author is dead serious about this novel -as they should be- and is dedicated to providing the readers a steady flow of updates. I recommend having a stock pile of chapters so you may not have to worry in writing up a chapter last minute. World Building: Though the plot is albeit fast paced, there is a steady amount of world building in the story. We follow various characters in the book, which allows the reader to widen the view of this book’s world with every chapter. Even though we’ve been thrown head first into a world with quite a bit of information overload (courtesy of chapter 0), we’re steadily introduced to things that we eventually become adjusted to. For this, I think the world building is quite well-done, even if I hoped that parts of the world would be further explored (for example, the dungeons; they are fascinating). Story Development: The story is unique as it has five main characters. Readers are able to see what the main characters are doing; with them, we face their struggles, their pains and their victories. As others have pointed out -as will I-, the premise of having five main characters is a big deal. It would be near-impossible for readers to keep track of each journey that each main character is on. It would be interesting to see how the Author showcases the individual adventures of each main character until their hopeful reunions. I believe that it would be a difficult journey for the Author to balance the spotlight for each main character as well as making the characters themselves memorable enough for a reader to not forget who is who, why so and so is doing what they are doing. I think that, with the right amount of attention, character building and so on that is given to each character of the story, the Author can create a master piece in this book. Having five main characters will either be the weakness of this book or -I am of the opinion- it will be carrying this book into a successful end. Summary: I heavily recommend this to readers who crave action and drama. There are aspects of found family, but from what I’ve read so far, there is no romance, which I find to be a relief. My favourite character so far has to be Satoshi -for no particular reason of course-. Aha, jokes aside, this really is a well-written book that can, with a bit of polishing, become quite popular. I cannot wait to read on as this story continues to develop. I look forward to see what the Author has to offer and what this book will become.
PsychoSatoshi
Commented
Oh that is pure evil, hahaha

Evie just giggled before saying, "We should take care of your wounds for a minute so they don't get infected." In the end, all you could hear was Gab's loud shrieking and the giggles of the others as they rubbed alcohol on his wounds.

Lost souls: Road to Godhood

Lost souls: Road to Godhood

Fantasy · Unknownking

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