braham116

1yr

Replied to Claud_Greertl

if you don't mind me asking, what was your first system novel?

braham116

1yr

Commented

question for author, does the entire novel keep switching POV or is it just the beginning?

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I Can Upgrade My Talent In Everything

Fantasy · MadScythe

braham116

1yr

Commented

This paragraph has been deleted.

I Can Upgrade My Talent In Everything

Fantasy · MadScythe

braham116

1yr

Commented

bro what's up with the constantly changing pov 😫, it's honestly getting annoying

This paragraph has been deleted.

I Can Upgrade My Talent In Everything

Fantasy · MadScythe

braham116

1yr

Replied to braham116

on PC they more spaced out than on mobile, only thing missing now is the commas, thanks for clearing that up for me

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braham116

1yr

Replied to Franklin_Nwakamma

I'll hop on my PC and see if it makes a difference

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braham116

1yr

Replied to Brendon_Drouant

for me, more than 1 person is considered a harem

'She is…noo, that won't be the case, right? Kathrine already likes Dilan.' She could only think while awaiting Yvonne's answer.

braham116

1yr

Replied to Franklin_Nwakamma

I'm on mobile, not sure if that changes anything or not

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question for author, does the story continue like this? just some of the paragraphs jumbled together without any commas or does it get better? I'm genuinely curious because I like the book so far (only on chap 1 lol) and it's kinda tough for me see where a sentence ends or pause

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My Angel system

Fantasy · Franklin_Nwakamma

braham116

1yr

Commented

'what's she going to do to me' he thought you can use ' for internal dialog

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My Angel system

Fantasy · Franklin_Nwakamma

braham116

1yr

Commented

this paragraph was kind of hard to read, everything was bunched up together

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My Angel system

Fantasy · Franklin_Nwakamma

braham116

1yr

Replied to pabIoESCOBAR

A notification floated in front of him welcoming him back, there was also a countdown that represented how long his immunity would last for. When you rejoined the game, you were given ten seconds of invulnerability, giving you just enough time to get your bearings and plan your next course of action. This was implemented to stop you getting annihilated by monsters after just spawning in, but it also helped with getting spawn camped by players.

Restarting From Genesis

Fantasy · TechnexGames

braham116

1yr

Replied to Banjohamster

He took a quick shower before getting ready for bed, he spent the next couple hours reading before his eyelids became too heavy to open. When he woke up, it was almost ten in the morning, his father and sister had already left for work, leaving Arthur to his own devices.

Restarting From Genesis

Fantasy · TechnexGames

braham116

1yr

Commented

space between the and majority

Unlike the mindless zombies that ran in a straight line, birds constantly moved sporadically, the new addition of the small woman with the bow couldn't possible keep up with them with such a short notice, Ailicia had used the majority of her knives in the fight before and wasn't able to retrieve the knives that were lodged into the zombies heads so her fighting ability was drastically reduce.

Becoming a Monster

Fantasy · Valtura

braham116

1yr

Commented

chap 107 an its only been a day 🥲🥲

The scene was just as he imagined it to be, not only was Noah excited, but he was beyond relieved. Seeing the apocalyptic city eased his heart to the fact the world was really as messed up as he hoped it was. There was no recovery from what transpired a day ago. No hope of modern civilization coming back within a few weeks of fighting back, this new world was here to stay.