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puukkiss

puukkiss

LV 3
2018-12-23 Joined Global

Badges 4

Moments 74

puukkiss
Posted
Stolen translation. Stolen translation. Stolen translation. Stolen translation. Stolen translation. Stolen translation. Stolen translation. Stolen translation. Stolen translation. Stolen translation. Stolen translation.
This book has been deleted.
puukkiss
Posted
I only got through eight chapters. The novel is far too ridiculous for my tastes. Some reviews have labeled the MC as stupid, but I feel he is not serious or even real. His behaviors and reactions resemble those of a player (PC) in an artificial environment populated with non-player characters (NPCs). While it was great in the beginning for him to fulfill the prior body's owner's task (even if he did it out of greed, not to retain his scholarly image of not breaking commitments), he immediately moved to sell his books. There is no exploring the world, nor is there any exploring of cultivation goods prices. He has no proof that his manuals work. After all, system novels that troll hosts are now popular. He simply acquired a vendor spot and plopped down... And the author wonders why everyone calls MC stupid. Also, when MC needs someone to use this cultivation manual, he goes to get a loli in the typical Chinese pedo way. Later, he finds a whole orphanage with children/lolis/shotas. MC is also a typical snob. He despises those who look down on him while looking down on everyone else. [He waved at the servant impatiently as if swatting a fly. He didn't even bother to turn around and face Li Chun.] [Meanwhile, Ikasa turned back to the booklets and thought, "Mere dog barking for his master." Ptui.] [Hehehe, that felt good. Serves you right for looking down on a Scholar!] MC is an unlikable person. While humor is subjective, this novel tries to squeeze laughs out of stupid situations and 'let's kick a dead horse 1000 times'. I don't even want to know how many more times situations involving the book's stupid names being the joke: "Ah, stupid-sounding name," at which point NPCs will become enraged at 'poor' MC. It wasn't funny the first time, and it wasn't funny the tenth time either. I suggest this book to everyone who has a goldfish memory. You've been a happy goldfish your entire life because you can't remember hearing the same joke 1000th times.
puukkiss
Posted
I read up to chapter 14. Writing style: Dramatic Lama! If it can be written dramatically, it will be! Meanwhile, MC could be described as dramatic OP emo. Dramatically, his family was killed right before his eyes. He was killed dramatically, while the bad guy explains that this is the end. Bla bla dramatically, bla bla. Dramatically, he cried, feeling pain that nobody has ever felt. Bla bla dramatically, bla bla. Dramatically, he got his hand bitten off, noticing it was gone only when he looked down at it. Blah blah, dramatic blah. Every scene tries to be that moment in movies where music plays or it moves in slow motion, or when silence stretches before a loud scream! While there is nothing wrong with having dramatic scenes, when you have chapter after chapter after chapter of dramatic everything, you not only lose the dramatic feel, but the novel begins to read as a comedy. There is a reason why nobody takes drama queens seriously. There is a reason why Drama Queens are a joke. Too dramatic for my tastes, and there are too many unanswered questions. Judging by other reviews, those questions aren't answered even after 100 chapters. I recommend this novel to dramatic lamas and drama queens! Meanwhile, I'll be fleeing before I start painting my nails black and gloomily looking at everything while muttering: "Nobody understands me, I have such deep feelings!" The following are some dramatic sentences with spoilers: "But eventually, my dreaded laughter had turned into the loud and wretched wails of a boy who was now in pain... A pain that very few would have experienced."/ just hours before, all humanity was killed off in brutal way, but only he can feel this special snowflake pain! XD "Even though I was crying, it was not because of my family's death, the death of my closest friend, nor was it due to the death of my girlfriend in the hands of those disgusting, deplorable aliens. Instead, I was simply crying out of agony. I felt in pain. The pressure of wanting to survive. The adrenaline streamed through me for so long that I had become numb to its effects. The fear of death hitting me at every corner and turn. It might have seemed selfish, but at the moment, I could only care about myself and nothing else." "'Why would home make me feel like I was looking into an empty void, where I was but a speck in the infinite cosmos, floating around without any weight... Any meaning... Any help.'" "Was this going to be the end? Was I really going to fail everyone and everything that had ever believed in me? Am I really going to die in vain, just like everyone else? Was this... Was this really the end?" "I could feel an unrelenting rage build up and boil within my very blood. The rage was like nothing I had ever felt before, and even though I could understand where it had been coming from, I didn't understand why it was so intense. A piercing, destructive and chaotic killing intent began to seep out of every pore in my body until I was finally enveloped in a dense red aura."
puukkiss
Replied to Lordwlesh
Weird, it looks fine from my side. BTW, I wrote this in the morning before coffee, so sorry about my edge lord's tone. Reposted replay: “(...)he had his reason(…)” Most authors who write edgelords or other unrealistic characters use this as an excuse. I understand that the outline of the story/character development makes sense in your brain, but it doesn't translate to what people see on paper/screen/text. Just as you don't notice those minor laziness errors and dismiss them as unimportant (given the fact that you haven't corrected them even after 2 months), there are logical flaws in your story and the basic main character temple MC. You have - a poor orphan, a classic trope in all types of media. Conveniently an Orphan from tvtropes “Refia: I am thankful to Father for taking care of an orphan like me for all these years, but... this is something I have to do. Luneth: Wait... you're an orphan, too? Refia: "Too"? You mean— Arc: I'm one, too! Ingus: Wait a minute... I, too, have no parents... — Final Fantasy III (DS translation)” You have - nobody loves me and I live alone. A classic in typical isakai/weeb stories. You have – I bought/freed a slave from slavery; therefore, they’ll now be 100% grateful and now 100% act like they are mind-controlled slave who worships the very ground you fart on. You have – the best two racist tropes, Mighty Whitey! And Led by the Outsider! Surrounded by monkeys, I am a monkey king! Only MC is smart enough to solve basic problems. “(..)by looking at the intelligence of his kind, well he does not want to bet on it so the best choice would be to fight.” What makes it even worse is the demon description: “They also have well-built bodies some were lean with appropriate muscles some bulky. they wore nothing on their bodies clearly showing their black as space skin.” They were basically black people turned demon slaves saved by white MC. Yaaay! Racism! You say there are reasons. Well, those reasons don’t change the fact, you purposely made an old, introverted man into a confident, strong, I’ll change this world's history in 4 chapters. You chose to write dumb, dark-skinned demon slaves that need to be saved by a smarter than natives western human. If this isn't the author’s w@nking off on himself, what is it?
puukkiss
Replied to Lordwlesh
“(...)he had his reason(…)” Most authors who write edge lords or other unrealistic characters use this as an excuse. I understand that the outline of the story/character development makes sense in your brain, but it doesn't translate to what people see on paper/screen/text. Just as you don't notice those minor laziness errors and dismiss them as unimportant (given the fact that you haven't corrected them even after 2 months), there are logical flaws in your story and the basic main character temple MC. You have - a poor orphan, a classic trope in all types of media. Conveniently an Orphan from tvtropes “Refia: I am thankful to Father for taking care of an orphan like me for all these years, but... this is something I have to do. Luneth: Wait... you're an orphan, too? Refia: "Too"? You mean— Arc: I'm one, too! Ingus: Wait a minute... I, too, have no parents... — Final Fantasy III (DS translation)” You have - nobody loves me and I live alone. A classic in typical isakai/weeb stories. You have – I bought/freed a slave from slavery; therefore, they’ll now be 100% grateful and now 100% act like they are mind-controlled slave who worships the very ground you fart on. You have – the best two racist tropes, Mighty Whitey! And Led by the Outsider! Surrounded by monkeys, I am a monkey king! Only MC is smart enough to solve basic problems. “(..)by looking at the intelligence of his kind, well he does not want to bet on it so the best choice would be to fight.” What makes it even worse is the demon description: “They also have well-built bodies some were lean with appropriate muscles some bulky. they wore nothing on their bodies clearly showing their black as space skin.” They were basically black people turned demon slaves saved by white MC. Yaaay! Racism! You say there are reasons. Well, those reasons don’t change the fact, you purposely made an old, introverted man into a confident, strong, I’ll change this world's history in 4 chapters. You chose to write dumb, dark-skinned demon slaves that need to be saved by a smarter than natives western human. If this isn't the author’s w@nking off on himself, what is it?
puukkiss
Posted
The author themselves asked for a review. Hopefully, they won't regret it. Leaving aside grammar issues, I believe this story suffers more from the author's inattention/laziness with simple mistakes. In the first chapter, the main character's name is written multiple times in lowercase. Not to mention, some sentences start in lowercase. "Yeah I know about the writing quality I am looking for an editor but till now have had no luck."/ Lordwlesh An editor won't solve laziness. Grammarly and other programs are free enough to fix most mistakes. "Get bored of The same annoying mindless characters having no soul of their own. The protagonist gets everything just on his whim and the world revolve around them . Then worry not this book is the right choice of yours. "/Lordwlesh That's sarcasm, right? Right? The plot is basic: a young boy/old man is taken to another world to become a lord. All of the followers appear to be brainwashed, brain dead—even the MC farts are fragrant—type characters. All I remember about MC is that he is elderly, dislikes games, likes tea, died in an amusing manner, and may have worked in theater since he speaks as if he is standing on stage and addressing the audience. Perhaps if he were British, sipping black tea would be enough to give him life as a character, but as it stands, MC is essentially a soulless stand-in for the author. Dialogues are on the stiff side, with a lot of characters exchanging info-dump piles between info-dump thoughts and paragraphs of info-dump. Those who don't care about grammar or plot will enjoy this novel. The authors' forced friends will also probably read this. I will, meanwhile, see myself out.
puukkiss
Posted
There were words on my screen. I read them all till chapter 10. However, all I could hear was an author w@nking off. Inflated numbers, inflated ego. Everyone is a dumb monkey while MC is a monkey king. Here, the author unknowingly admits what a trash gamer MC is who can't play games unless he cheats: “Black Gold System? Wasn’t this the system of a single-player game that he had played before? That game was developed by a friend of his, and he asked Richard to try it out. However, due to the difficulty of the game, Richard complained a few times, so the other party specially created this system for him.” The author unknowingly admits here what a trash friend MC is who after gaining a cheat from his friend doesn’t even care to find him or worry about him: “Richard opened [Forum Chat] first. He wanted to know what was going on.” “Some people were at a loss. Many of them kept asking for help in returning to the real world. On the other hand, some ambitious people were eager to try and explore the game world. After looking at the forum for a long time, Richard’s complicated feelings gradually eased up. There were so many people. He was not alone.” Unknowingly, the author admits that MC is a trashy self-absorbed man: “Richard nodded his head in satisfaction. Only weaklings would like a cute beast-eared girl. A real man should fight against a mummy.” A real man would help his friend from whom he got the cheat to dominate the game instead of rating whatever a cute beast-eared girl or mummy if better mob. It is a novel I would recommend to trash enthusiasts. You know who you are and what you like. In the meantime, I'm leaving this dumpster fire alone.
puukkiss
Posted
Not too shabby. While the beginning stumbles a little as it tries to find its voice, tempo, and emphasis, it eventually settles into its own rhythm. MC could be described as OP while attempting to prove that he is not OP. He always has enough points or luck or items to do everything. At first, Inn is squished to the side as MC does dumb things on earth, but thankfully, before I lost my patience, Inn returns to center stage, with MC's shenanigans diminished. If the author ever considers rewriting the beginning, it is advised that they devote more time to the inn and either reduce or move the MC's shenanigans later. Many low star reviews are about absence of inn in beginning chapters: “Not even half of the first 20 chapter is actually about the Inn.”/Rappel; “This has great potential right until chapter 10. The author completetly ruined their work.”/KIING (10 chapter introduces cultivators on earth and shifts focus from inn to MC shenanigans on earth); “Forced plot with cultivators and his family.”/Elder; Readers dislike for cultivation probably comes from two facts: it takes away time from the inn and every world and dimension has the same type of cultivation. All worlds have similar feeling. It is almost bad as MassEffect color ending. Choose your world, one has humans, other world has humans and dead humans, third has humans and animals, but all of them have cultivation and humans! Even none humans look like humans. Overall, readable novel if you don’t mind OP MC, cultivation, and aliens that are all human.
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puukkiss
Posted
At first, this was a pretty good read, but slowly it started to get repetitive. For a novel about teachings and teachers, it's more about fights, face slapping, and 80% how great the MC is. His students (the female ones) just rave about how great he is. Male students have almost no screen time because the author probably did not want to write so many men swooning over MC. What annoyed me from the beginning was that MC gave his two underage student girls (12-13 years?) nicknames: sunny egg and papaya girl. Both referring to their breast sizes... HE WAS A TEACHER IN HIS LAST LIFE OF MODERN TIME AND NOW A TEACHER IN CULTIVATION WORLD. Chinese people and their pedophilic tendencies... The last straw was the competitive arc between schools. Yes, in this world, in order to evaluate schools and increase prestige, thus empowering students, it's a smart idea to throw them into a competition where both students and teachers die 20% or more... (sarcasm) Let's face it, such a society would not last. What is to stop other schools from murdering each other after their promising students and teachers are killed in competition? The amount of resentment and malice created in any competition would be enough to bring more than one bloody war upon the land. Not to mention that in such a competition, the brave and the strong would die first. What's the point of that? And the MC, a person from our time, is okay with murder (as are all Chinese MC). I think I am sick and tired of "*****, real-world" novels that are basically edgy 13-year-olds. A world cannot be law-abiding, with schools and respect for teachers, and at the same time, the strong murder the weak, students kill students from other schools. Basically, the author just started writing just another cultivation novel. The teachers are just murdering masters and the schools are sects. And everyone is a backstabbing asshole. The worst is the MC since the author is doing his best to keep the MC on moral high ground, but actions speak louder than words. He is the same as everyone else. A pathetic murderer.
puukkiss
Commented
Interesting, although the sentences could be more fluid. Some editing would help. As for the content. For someone so greedy that even gods (or whatever) noticed, the descriptions sound more like an average rich man. Probably because nothing specific was mentioned. Maybe an addition like his children didn't love him, but what should he expect since each had a different mother, half of whom he discarded as superfluous extras while the other half only got the minimum a millionaire's spawn should have. From his point of view, they were unnecessary expenses on HIS resources. And now He was a superfluous timekeeper on the inheritance. Unfortunately, there was no way to bury everything he had with him, as some Farron. Since from his point of view, everything he had should be his, even in death. No one had a right to inherit his greed. But even if he hid all his wealth, someone would find it within 24 hours of his death. The obstacle of technology. Or something like that. Greed is greed. Greed worthy of the attention of a supernatural being should be even more explosive. Right now he sounds like an old fart who was big in the past, but now a nobody. Look at "Saw" movies. The old guy, old and sick, near death, showed the world his greed to control death and life. Besides, what's up with the old lady who turns into a young, beautiful woman? From her dialogs, it appears that she dislikes him. And yet she flaunts her breasts to please him? "Under her pointy black hat was an alluring beauty that Sakim himself found his heart wanting to jump out from his chest. " Strange. Even if that was her true appearance, she would have no reason to show it. The scene was like, look, I am not old, I am good looking for you to have wet dreams, he he he.... She transformed from an unknown powerful being with unknown motivations to... To a woman sent by someone else powerful to warm the bed of a potential client. Now she is worth no more than her bo0bs.

ch 0 2 Vessel Of The Greed Sin

Single Stat System

Single Stat System

Games · Jimar_Jemar

puukkiss
puukkiss
Posted
Read 7 chapters. For someone who dies because of wishing to see his sister, she hadn't been mentioned once in his thoughts. Quote: "He usually would not go this route because it led through an enemy gang's turf but his desire to see his sister clouded his judgement. " "He knew it was wrong but it was the only way he could keep his family fed and it offered a semblance of protection in their violence filled neighborhood." It would seem that the MC turned into "What past? I have no past." This basically made the beginning pointless. The novel might as well have started with the demons right away. Because the cornerstones of what made MC at the beginning, him valuing family and bearing responsibility, are jettisoned right after, turning him into an empty state character who, as he quips after the fact he is leveling his following skill. Quote: "Azemo kept leveling his only skill as he silently followed Zaebos, he would probably be a max level follower in no time." Also, quote: "We summoned you eight to become generals in the war against humanity. " After hearing the demon say, that MC will have to kill his mom and sister since they are humans, his next shown thought is... Quote: "'This room is really cozy.' " Yeah, zero reaction. MC is an empty puppet. Which makes demons in return hollow shells. Demons against Humans are morality war between good and evil. There can't be good or evil if the MC is an empty shell of a character who simply reacts after hearing all this. "'This room is really cozy.' " .... .. . Well, at least the grammar here is fine and well written in places. The sentences flow smoothly. Which actually just dragged me down more. Empty shell MC is usually found in authors with poor grammar and jumpy sentences that are smooth as sandpaper. In the end I feel disappointed.
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puukkiss
puukkiss
Posted
Due to the dumbing-down of everyone to make MC intelligent, MC is basically a king of Monkeys. His smartness is... reading beforehand about the dungeon - something almost no one seems to do. His cleverness is... not being cocky. As typical in superpower stories, my power is rank [insert higher than lowest], therefore I'll be cocky as eff, and I'll march into unknown dangers thinking everyone is beneath me. And then regret it and MC will come in to save the day. His cleverness is not shown in battle, using tricks, imagination, clever tactics. He fights with a knife pointed forward and later with a flame pointed forward. Okay, he uses the most basic game tactic of the boss weak point... the monster's mouth... no one would have figured out that the monster's weak point is its mouth/sarcasm And of course, the only woman who has more than one line about her wants to get into MC pants after she finds out how great he really is. Quote from a chapter: "Wendy, who at that moment was trying to stop the bite wound of the girl who had flattered Harry, couldn't stop spying in Noah's direction. "He... That flame of his does a lot of damage to the boss; he's definitely not just a blessed Rank F... Damn Amy, if you hadn't..." Yes, as the battle goes on, as they may die, as she heals her best friend's torn open bloody wound, she laments that her friend prevented previously her from flirting with the MC before. This BTW was mentioned a few times before, this particular scene just further highlighted how braindead it sounds. As for Lucifer... Right now it's just being used as a fancy edgy name. No symbolism or deeper thinking found so far. After all, only humans can sin, but for some reason burning random rats works. I'd liked to see a restriction on the power that only sinful human burning can upgrade the skill. That would give the upgrade a more monumental feel. Now it feels like he gets double exp. Kill first, then burn. Nothing fun at all. The Vampire system at least tackles it with needing different humans and second fang dips didn't count. This story's MC can farm all the "sinful" (how are they sinful??) rats. As it is now, this novel is a barebone basic system/powers/dungeon novel. The characters are cardboard cutouts. The powers are basic and uninteresting. Most shown are the story basic cookies cutouts Fire, Ice, and Healing. And they are used by pointing hands and shooting... They aren't described interestingly.
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