Webnovel Author: ArimaM - Fanfic Collection

ty, u save me

I will be completely honest, the first volume of your story seemed interesting and entertaining to read, I liked the rhythm of the story, it is true that there was a point that became a bit tedious, but it was understandable by the development you wanted to give to each character, even if they would later be discarded (like the protagonist's grandfather). The problem arises from the second volume, and some details that were not followed up or made any sense (for example, what happened to Marcus and the other soldiers who were called by Bernard? Or why did the protagonist make such dangerous decisions?) , I honestly think that these details happened to want to advance the rhythm with which the story was developed, and to be able to lead the protagonist to be in stupid situations (taking into account that the protagonist had the knowledge of Orochimaru and Jiraya, both highly trained and experienced). Personally, I did not like the relationship between Natasha and Bucky at all, and even caused me a rejection, but don't get me wrong, I can understand your decision to want to differentiate yourself from the other novels by not putting such a cliche love interest. Although, you should have deepened and developed more the relationship that those two people had (Here, I consider that your problem was the rhythm that your novel was having, if you had continued with the rhythm that you had in the first volume, you would not have had so many opinions rejecting your idea). Finally, I understand the reason why you accelerated the pace of your novel, and the reason for the details that I do not like. To clarify, the points that I do not like about your novel are, first, the little development that there is in the second volume, and second, the decisions or forced subplots for a development of some event. The cause of me stopping reading your story is the hasty pace of your novel, which causes your story to have plots, and relationships between characters so robotic. I hope you take my opinion positively, and it will serve you in a future project.